[ That pushes him overboard — simple praise that he once might've scorned, now spreading pleasure throughout his body. He gasps, and the next roll of his hips sends him over the edge. Endo jerks against Umemiya's hold, cries out, and comes hard, his mind going blank.
In the immediate aftermath, he shivers with the aftershock and opens his eyes to meet Umemiya's with his own, his face flush, his heart still beating quickly, but a hint of triumph in his gaze.
As predicted, he's now a mess, but that doesn't stop him from asking: ]
[ Though his wrists are now freed, Endo's muscles feel lazy with the aftermath of pleasure — his limbs languid and unresponsive. He does need to clean up, but the effort seems too much, the distance it would put between himself and Umemiya not worth it. So he simply does not move, preferring his current position above all else. ]
I always thought I would fuck you.
[ His voice is a murmur, as lazy as the rest of him. His eyes are half-lidded. He feels the power of Umemiya's dominance, but his submissive headspace is a little different this time — more playful than fully submerged.
The words he speaks are true, despite the upturn of his lips. Back under the mistletoe, back before all of this — hell, even at the beginning of this, after that first session. Truthfully, there was only one person that Endo would imagine topping him — the only person who'd outright reject him. ]
I always thought you'd loathe me forever. That we would tear each other apart before sex ever entered the picture.
[There's a soft, startled little laugh after a second.] Of course, I also thought you were a Dominant. You put on such a good show of it. No one else gets to know this sweet pet beside me.
[ Tearing each other apart did seem inevitable; Endo wanted to, many times. Even more recently, he had considered it, though the feelings that fueled those impulses had shifted into something more personal — more self-defiant. He's never wanted to be vulnerable. He's never wanted to want anyone other than Takiishi.
But after the mistletoe, dominance over Umemiya seemed synonymous with sex. Endo thought about making him cry. He thought about breaking him, and wondered how much harder it would be than breaking Sakura. He considering bringing him home as a prize, tied up pretty for Takiishi.
And he might've. He wants to believe he could've. Endo is excellent at putting on shows and filling the roles required of him. He is not, however, a dominant. If it had gone a more violent way — who's to say that Umemiya wouldn't have looked him in the eye and ordered him to stop? Who's to say that Endo, desperate and lonely, would not have listened?
Those thoughts don't matter now. And Umemiya is right: no one else will ever get to know him like this — nor in all the other ways that Umemiya will come to know him.
In agreement: ]
No one gets to touch me like you do.
[ Which brings him to his original point: ]
You could fuck me, y'know.
[ Not a demand, not even a request. He states it as a fact. ]
I could. I plan to, at some point. But I'm cautious about doing it here.
[Where Takiishi lives, where he might walk in at some point. That feels...like a significantly bigger risk than he's willing to accept. There's a lot about what's going on between Endo and Takiishi that Umemiya doesn't understand, and he doesn't know how to ask.
So he doesn't, and exercises what feels like a reasonable amount of caution.
He's half-scared even saying that much is pressing a finger against a bruise.]
[ This reminder of their reality is necessary. Endo's caught up in the moment, in his own semi-confession, so he isn't thinking about much else. That's the point of these sessions — or part of the point. It's not that he doesn't want to think about Takiishi — he still reveres him, still devotes himself to him. Rather, tonight was about a break. A temporary seclusion from everything else — a means of preventing himself from thinking about the rest. But Umemiya is right in his implication. Endo would be devastated to have Takiishi come home to this, no matter how little Takiishi would care. It would feel like a double betrayal — because Takiishi likes Umemiya.
Logically, Umemiya enforcing boundaries is a good thing. So there's nothing logical in the way those words sting. Especially because, as Endo finally looks away from Umemiya, studying the ceiling instead of his face, he can't decide what bothers him most. If it's the fact that Umemiya is holding back, at a time when Endo needs — something; if it's the reminder that Takiishi wouldn't do this for him, regardless of whether he walked in on it or not. Or maybe Endo feels somewhat exposed for having said it at all. He's fucked plenty of women; he's gotten kinky in all sorts of ways. But this is different — personal. It's something he's always wanted from someone else.
Abruptly: ]
I wanna clean up.
[ His pants are cold and wet, something that didn't matter before but now stands out as too uncomfortable. ]
[Umemiya feels that shift in energy, saying nothing more as he rolls off Endo and lets him get up. Was he wrong to have said it? No, he doesn't think so, but it still broke something between them.
Takiishi is always going to be the ghost that haunts whatever relationship he and Endo have, just as much as he haunts the memory of many third-year Furin students. But here, he doesn't know what to do with that fact, like he does at school.]
[ Endo goes to his bathroom and takes his time cleaning himself up. He changes back into his old pjs, as Umemiya said he was going to instruct him to do, and then walks back into the room.
In a quiet tone: ]
Are you staying?
[ That was the original plan — at least for a while longer — but Takiishi is now present in the room, despite the fact that he won't be home for hours yet. ]
Yeah, I'm staying. I'm going to cuddle you. We can keep bickering about who gets to be big spoon, or you can come here and be held for a while.
[It's much less fraught than the idea of Takiishi coming home to them having sex. Honestly, the idea of cuddling with both of them is a fantasy that Umemiya won't admit even under threat of death.]
[ His tone isn't combative; it's still quiet, but Endo gets into bed nonetheless and lies on his side, facing the wall. He doesn't say anything else for the moment, just waits for Umemiya to get in place. ]
[Umemiya slowly curls in around him, slotting himself in like a matching puzzle piece. Arm over Endo's waist, ankles tangling with his. Close, pressed close. Nosing at the back of his neck through Endo's hair.]
[ Though he doesn't think that he'll be able to relax so easily, all the tension within Endo begins to drain once Umemiya's curled around him. Takiishi is still in the back of his mind, as he always is, but Endo closes his eyes to enjoy this. ]
Mmm.
[ Then, after a moment: ]
You're warm.
[ Umemiya usually is, but Endo is more aware of it now. ]
Here's a threat: I could bring Takiishi home early. :P
[And in this moment, he's at peace, too, more than he usually allows himself to be. He's not a compass attuned to Takiishi; he can let the other boy slip from his mind and just hold Endo.]
[ Endo huffs at that, though it isn't a real protest. He still doesn't think of himself as all those adjectives Umemiya once wrote upon his skin — not when he isn't fully under — but he's it's true that he's lost some edge when it comes to Umemiya.
When it comes to this.
He doesn't overthink it. He allows himself to be lulled — not toward sleep, but not toward staying awake. Somewhere in between, fully at ease. ]
[ Endo hears his entrance immediately. He's attuned to it, and has been throughout all the time he's lived with Takiishi — especially after that incident with the door. As soon as Takiishi is walking inside, Endo breaks away from Umemiya and hisses: ]
Shit —
[ He realizes he hadn't checked in with Takiishi at all, which is unlike him, regardless of the likelihood of Takiishi not answering. He's painfully aware that he's dressed like crap and can't change, because his clothes are all in their walk-in closed.
And Umemiya is in his fucking bed. ]
Shit.
[ Rare for him, his tone takes on an emotional edge, though he's still quiet.
It's not a matter of whether Takiishi will care or not. Endo cares. He cares so fucking much that he digs the heels of his hands into his eyes to attempt to think through some stupid plan before he takes any action at all. ]
[Umemiya stays still, watching Endo's back. Yeah, this isn't an idea situation, but he knew it was a risk of everything they were doing. Still, this isn't his home, and he's not sure what to do, so he's going to defer to Endo on this one.
From what both of them can hear, though, Takiishi's come home in a mood that's not immediately explosive. Nothing's being thrown across the kitchen and living room; there's no yelling.]
[ Endo begins in a whisper, a clear threat in his tone — one that he has never used with Umemiya before. But as soon as he says that first word, he cuts himself off, because nothing warrants any statement that would follow. Umemiya isn't doing anything at all. There's nothing to warn him off of.
And he has no plan. Sure, he could probably come up with something, but anything he thinks of would be insulting to Takiishi or offensive to Umemiya. And Endo doesn't want either of those things.
It's no big deal, on paper. Takiishi doesn't have expectations for Endo. He does like Umemiya, and that's a little fucked up on Endo's part, but that's not the part that's really messed up.
Endo had his own rules about this kind of thing. Respecting their space. Respecting Takiishi. Keeping people away, and always putting him first.
He made a stupid, selfish decision, all because he didn't want to be alone.
It's too late to take it back, so Endo opens the door and while he keeps his body language loose and easy enough, there's a subdued quality to it all the same. ]
Hey.
[ He says this to Takiishi. He hasn't given Umemiya instructions at all. In fact, he hasn't even looked at him. ]
[So, like, he could change and go back out. Or he could lounge on the couch in the nice air conditioned house. Either way, he needs a moment. Ugh, hot.
Umemiya stays in the bedroom, pretending not to be listening to everything.]
[ Endo heads to their shared closet, carefully picks out better, looser clothes for Takiishi and quickly changes into a nicer pair of pajamas for himself — again. He also attempts to quickly tame his hair, since it's mussed from lying in bed.
When he emerges, he sets the clothes on the counter for Takiishi to grab whenever he's ready. ]
Umemiya's here, by the way.
[ He says it casually, but he doesn't feel casual about it at all. ]
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In the immediate aftermath, he shivers with the aftershock and opens his eyes to meet Umemiya's with his own, his face flush, his heart still beating quickly, but a hint of triumph in his gaze.
As predicted, he's now a mess, but that doesn't stop him from asking: ]
How was that?
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[Umemiya meets Endo's eyes, moving his leg so he's straddling Endo instead, letting go of his wrists.]
Let me know when you want me to let you up to clean yourself up. But don't feel you need to rush about it.
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I always thought I would fuck you.
[ His voice is a murmur, as lazy as the rest of him. His eyes are half-lidded. He feels the power of Umemiya's dominance, but his submissive headspace is a little different this time — more playful than fully submerged.
The words he speaks are true, despite the upturn of his lips. Back under the mistletoe, back before all of this — hell, even at the beginning of this, after that first session. Truthfully, there was only one person that Endo would imagine topping him — the only person who'd outright reject him. ]
I bet you always assumed you'd fuck me.
[ He raises himself up on his elbows. ]
Hmm?
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[There's a soft, startled little laugh after a second.] Of course, I also thought you were a Dominant. You put on such a good show of it. No one else gets to know this sweet pet beside me.
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But after the mistletoe, dominance over Umemiya seemed synonymous with sex. Endo thought about making him cry. He thought about breaking him, and wondered how much harder it would be than breaking Sakura. He considering bringing him home as a prize, tied up pretty for Takiishi.
And he might've. He wants to believe he could've. Endo is excellent at putting on shows and filling the roles required of him. He is not, however, a dominant. If it had gone a more violent way — who's to say that Umemiya wouldn't have looked him in the eye and ordered him to stop? Who's to say that Endo, desperate and lonely, would not have listened?
Those thoughts don't matter now. And Umemiya is right: no one else will ever get to know him like this — nor in all the other ways that Umemiya will come to know him.
In agreement: ]
No one gets to touch me like you do.
[ Which brings him to his original point: ]
You could fuck me, y'know.
[ Not a demand, not even a request. He states it as a fact. ]
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[Where Takiishi lives, where he might walk in at some point. That feels...like a significantly bigger risk than he's willing to accept. There's a lot about what's going on between Endo and Takiishi that Umemiya doesn't understand, and he doesn't know how to ask.
So he doesn't, and exercises what feels like a reasonable amount of caution.
He's half-scared even saying that much is pressing a finger against a bruise.]
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Logically, Umemiya enforcing boundaries is a good thing. So there's nothing logical in the way those words sting. Especially because, as Endo finally looks away from Umemiya, studying the ceiling instead of his face, he can't decide what bothers him most. If it's the fact that Umemiya is holding back, at a time when Endo needs — something; if it's the reminder that Takiishi wouldn't do this for him, regardless of whether he walked in on it or not. Or maybe Endo feels somewhat exposed for having said it at all. He's fucked plenty of women; he's gotten kinky in all sorts of ways. But this is different — personal. It's something he's always wanted from someone else.
Abruptly: ]
I wanna clean up.
[ His pants are cold and wet, something that didn't matter before but now stands out as too uncomfortable. ]
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[Umemiya feels that shift in energy, saying nothing more as he rolls off Endo and lets him get up. Was he wrong to have said it? No, he doesn't think so, but it still broke something between them.
Takiishi is always going to be the ghost that haunts whatever relationship he and Endo have, just as much as he haunts the memory of many third-year Furin students. But here, he doesn't know what to do with that fact, like he does at school.]
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In a quiet tone: ]
Are you staying?
[ That was the original plan — at least for a while longer — but Takiishi is now present in the room, despite the fact that he won't be home for hours yet. ]
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[It's much less fraught than the idea of Takiishi coming home to them having sex. Honestly, the idea of cuddling with both of them is a fantasy that Umemiya won't admit even under threat of death.]
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[ His tone isn't combative; it's still quiet, but Endo gets into bed nonetheless and lies on his side, facing the wall. He doesn't say anything else for the moment, just waits for Umemiya to get in place. ]
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Comfy?
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Mmm.
[ Then, after a moment: ]
You're warm.
[ Umemiya usually is, but Endo is more aware of it now. ]
Here's a threat: I could bring Takiishi home early. :P
[And in this moment, he's at peace, too, more than he usually allows himself to be. He's not a compass attuned to Takiishi; he can let the other boy slip from his mind and just hold Endo.]
omg if you're up for it i support this immensely
When it comes to this.
He doesn't overthink it. He allows himself to be lulled — not toward sleep, but not toward staying awake. Somewhere in between, fully at ease. ]
*cracks knuckles*
It's not more than an hour of silent drifting before the front door of the house opens and then footsteps can be heard in the kitchen.]
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Shit —
[ He realizes he hadn't checked in with Takiishi at all, which is unlike him, regardless of the likelihood of Takiishi not answering. He's painfully aware that he's dressed like crap and can't change, because his clothes are all in their walk-in closed.
And Umemiya is in his fucking bed. ]
Shit.
[ Rare for him, his tone takes on an emotional edge, though he's still quiet.
It's not a matter of whether Takiishi will care or not. Endo cares. He cares so fucking much that he digs the heels of his hands into his eyes to attempt to think through some stupid plan before he takes any action at all. ]
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From what both of them can hear, though, Takiishi's come home in a mood that's not immediately explosive. Nothing's being thrown across the kitchen and living room; there's no yelling.]
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[ Endo begins in a whisper, a clear threat in his tone — one that he has never used with Umemiya before. But as soon as he says that first word, he cuts himself off, because nothing warrants any statement that would follow. Umemiya isn't doing anything at all. There's nothing to warn him off of.
And he has no plan. Sure, he could probably come up with something, but anything he thinks of would be insulting to Takiishi or offensive to Umemiya. And Endo doesn't want either of those things.
It's no big deal, on paper. Takiishi doesn't have expectations for Endo. He does like Umemiya, and that's a little fucked up on Endo's part, but that's not the part that's really messed up.
Endo had his own rules about this kind of thing. Respecting their space. Respecting Takiishi. Keeping people away, and always putting him first.
He made a stupid, selfish decision, all because he didn't want to be alone.
It's too late to take it back, so Endo opens the door and while he keeps his body language loose and easy enough, there's a subdued quality to it all the same. ]
Hey.
[ He says this to Takiishi. He hasn't given Umemiya instructions at all. In fact, he hasn't even looked at him. ]
You're home early.
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[So, like, he could change and go back out. Or he could lounge on the couch in the nice air conditioned house. Either way, he needs a moment. Ugh, hot.
Umemiya stays in the bedroom, pretending not to be listening to everything.]
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Want me to pick something else out for you?
[ Something lighter and more comfortable. Then Endo can change, too.
When he turns back around, he glances at the door. He'll tell Takiishi, but only after he finishes taking care of him as best he can, considering. ]
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[If Takiishi has even noticed a difference in what Endo is wearing, it doesn't show on his face as he goes to the fridge for a snack.]
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When he emerges, he sets the clothes on the counter for Takiishi to grab whenever he's ready. ]
Umemiya's here, by the way.
[ He says it casually, but he doesn't feel casual about it at all. ]
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[Takiishi isn't upset, he's just completely confused. The path that leads to Umemiya being here in their home isn't something he can perceive.]
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