[ Endo goes to his bathroom and takes his time cleaning himself up. He changes back into his old pjs, as Umemiya said he was going to instruct him to do, and then walks back into the room.
In a quiet tone: ]
Are you staying?
[ That was the original plan — at least for a while longer — but Takiishi is now present in the room, despite the fact that he won't be home for hours yet. ]
Yeah, I'm staying. I'm going to cuddle you. We can keep bickering about who gets to be big spoon, or you can come here and be held for a while.
[It's much less fraught than the idea of Takiishi coming home to them having sex. Honestly, the idea of cuddling with both of them is a fantasy that Umemiya won't admit even under threat of death.]
[ His tone isn't combative; it's still quiet, but Endo gets into bed nonetheless and lies on his side, facing the wall. He doesn't say anything else for the moment, just waits for Umemiya to get in place. ]
[Umemiya slowly curls in around him, slotting himself in like a matching puzzle piece. Arm over Endo's waist, ankles tangling with his. Close, pressed close. Nosing at the back of his neck through Endo's hair.]
[ Though he doesn't think that he'll be able to relax so easily, all the tension within Endo begins to drain once Umemiya's curled around him. Takiishi is still in the back of his mind, as he always is, but Endo closes his eyes to enjoy this. ]
Mmm.
[ Then, after a moment: ]
You're warm.
[ Umemiya usually is, but Endo is more aware of it now. ]
Here's a threat: I could bring Takiishi home early. :P
[And in this moment, he's at peace, too, more than he usually allows himself to be. He's not a compass attuned to Takiishi; he can let the other boy slip from his mind and just hold Endo.]
[ Endo huffs at that, though it isn't a real protest. He still doesn't think of himself as all those adjectives Umemiya once wrote upon his skin — not when he isn't fully under — but he's it's true that he's lost some edge when it comes to Umemiya.
When it comes to this.
He doesn't overthink it. He allows himself to be lulled — not toward sleep, but not toward staying awake. Somewhere in between, fully at ease. ]
[ Endo hears his entrance immediately. He's attuned to it, and has been throughout all the time he's lived with Takiishi — especially after that incident with the door. As soon as Takiishi is walking inside, Endo breaks away from Umemiya and hisses: ]
Shit —
[ He realizes he hadn't checked in with Takiishi at all, which is unlike him, regardless of the likelihood of Takiishi not answering. He's painfully aware that he's dressed like crap and can't change, because his clothes are all in their walk-in closed.
And Umemiya is in his fucking bed. ]
Shit.
[ Rare for him, his tone takes on an emotional edge, though he's still quiet.
It's not a matter of whether Takiishi will care or not. Endo cares. He cares so fucking much that he digs the heels of his hands into his eyes to attempt to think through some stupid plan before he takes any action at all. ]
[Umemiya stays still, watching Endo's back. Yeah, this isn't an idea situation, but he knew it was a risk of everything they were doing. Still, this isn't his home, and he's not sure what to do, so he's going to defer to Endo on this one.
From what both of them can hear, though, Takiishi's come home in a mood that's not immediately explosive. Nothing's being thrown across the kitchen and living room; there's no yelling.]
[ Endo begins in a whisper, a clear threat in his tone — one that he has never used with Umemiya before. But as soon as he says that first word, he cuts himself off, because nothing warrants any statement that would follow. Umemiya isn't doing anything at all. There's nothing to warn him off of.
And he has no plan. Sure, he could probably come up with something, but anything he thinks of would be insulting to Takiishi or offensive to Umemiya. And Endo doesn't want either of those things.
It's no big deal, on paper. Takiishi doesn't have expectations for Endo. He does like Umemiya, and that's a little fucked up on Endo's part, but that's not the part that's really messed up.
Endo had his own rules about this kind of thing. Respecting their space. Respecting Takiishi. Keeping people away, and always putting him first.
He made a stupid, selfish decision, all because he didn't want to be alone.
It's too late to take it back, so Endo opens the door and while he keeps his body language loose and easy enough, there's a subdued quality to it all the same. ]
Hey.
[ He says this to Takiishi. He hasn't given Umemiya instructions at all. In fact, he hasn't even looked at him. ]
[So, like, he could change and go back out. Or he could lounge on the couch in the nice air conditioned house. Either way, he needs a moment. Ugh, hot.
Umemiya stays in the bedroom, pretending not to be listening to everything.]
[ Endo heads to their shared closet, carefully picks out better, looser clothes for Takiishi and quickly changes into a nicer pair of pajamas for himself — again. He also attempts to quickly tame his hair, since it's mussed from lying in bed.
When he emerges, he sets the clothes on the counter for Takiishi to grab whenever he's ready. ]
Umemiya's here, by the way.
[ He says it casually, but he doesn't feel casual about it at all. ]
[ Truthfully, Endo has no idea how to explain how a simple, singular session spiraled into what it is today. He doesn't think Takiishi has ever really thought about his needs. In fact, Endo isn't sure if Takiishi's aware that he's a submissive at all. On paper, it's probably obvious that Endo has always desired to serve him — but that doesn't mean that Takiishi has ever cared to think about it.
Endo doesn't think he has.
And that's perfectly fine — he doesn't need him to know — but it makes this situation more awkward.
It would be even harder to explain the cascading effect of Takiishi's decision to go out, but that's because it would lead to confessions that Endo doesn't foist upon him. So all he says is: ]
[ He used to hate Umemiya. For a while, Endo felt like he'd never stop hating him, despite the developing dynamic between them. But he's admitted to himself that he doesn't, not anymore — even if he isn't always the best at conveying it.
He doesn't say this, though it's not because he's trying to be difficult or keep secrets. It's just hard to face it himself sometimes, with how everything still tangles up within him. ]
In my bedroom.
[ He isn't embarrassed — just guilty, frustrated with himself, and apologetic. ]
[Takiishi's eyebrows shoot up as he tries to figure out how that happened. He doesn't speak for a long moment, instead grabbing the clothes Endo brought him.]
[ That stretched out moment of silence is excruciating — as is Takiishi's expression. He may not be upset, but the surprise and ultimate dismissal of the topic — from Endo's perspective — only fuels Endo's mixed emotions. He wasn't trying to surprise him. Aside from the occasional treat or small gifts, Endo doesn't tend to spring the unexpected on him. But since he did — and since this is big — there's a part of him that wishes Takiishi would have more of a reaction.
That's a thought he immediately shoves down, because it's irrational. He doesn't want to make Takiishi angry or unhappy, no matter what, so it doesn't make sense that he'd want more from him.
He smiles for the first time since Takiishi's arrival. ]
Yeah, okay.
[ He wants Takiishi to be comfortable.
But as soon as Takiishi goes to do that, Endo returns to his bedroom, running a hand through his hair as he looks at Umemiya. ]
You should go.
[ This is all he says, immediately turning to go back to the kitchen to wait for Takiishi. It is not the way a submissive should be treating a Dominant. It's not the way someone should treat the person who just held him, making him feel secure and cared for in the ways he's wanted — but it feels like this is over.
He warned Umemiya. But Endo still feels like shit about it, just like he feels like shit for doing this in the first place. ]
[ It isn't Umemiya's fault. Endo invited him. But this situation causes old, barely conquered habits to slip through, and Endo simply lets him apologize and take on that burden. It's fucked up, but Endo wants him to blame himself; it gratifies him in some small, ugly way that he wouldn't be able to dig into even if he wanted to. Despite everything, he's still himself — a manipulative asshole who prefers to move pawns according to his — and ultimately Takiishi's — desires. So screw it. Umemiya can feel bad.
There's an honest answer to Umemiya's question, which is that there is something that isn't turning out okay, but Endo is back to dismissiveness, a wall firmly back in place. ]
You heard him. It's no big deal.
[ At the least, Takiishi did not say anything to indicate that he cares either which way, aside from being surprised at the situation.
It is a big deal though — to Endo, if no one else. ]
You can kick me out, but don't lie to me like that.
[He knows Endo well enough to almost feel the way his heart is squeezed in a situation like this. But he's moving for the door, knowing that lingering won't help anyone.]
[ He says it without bothering to look at Umemiya again. He doesn't want to see anything in his face. He doesn't want sympathy, or care, or hurt, or any of that — not anymore. He just wants to go back to taking care of Takiishi, like this never happened. Like Umemiya never happened.
But that thought makes him clench his teeth as he stares at the refrigerator, a subtle tension tightening his shoulders. Because even now, in the thick of all of this, Endo is still Umemiya's.
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In a quiet tone: ]
Are you staying?
[ That was the original plan — at least for a while longer — but Takiishi is now present in the room, despite the fact that he won't be home for hours yet. ]
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[It's much less fraught than the idea of Takiishi coming home to them having sex. Honestly, the idea of cuddling with both of them is a fantasy that Umemiya won't admit even under threat of death.]
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[ His tone isn't combative; it's still quiet, but Endo gets into bed nonetheless and lies on his side, facing the wall. He doesn't say anything else for the moment, just waits for Umemiya to get in place. ]
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Comfy?
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Mmm.
[ Then, after a moment: ]
You're warm.
[ Umemiya usually is, but Endo is more aware of it now. ]
Here's a threat: I could bring Takiishi home early. :P
[And in this moment, he's at peace, too, more than he usually allows himself to be. He's not a compass attuned to Takiishi; he can let the other boy slip from his mind and just hold Endo.]
omg if you're up for it i support this immensely
When it comes to this.
He doesn't overthink it. He allows himself to be lulled — not toward sleep, but not toward staying awake. Somewhere in between, fully at ease. ]
*cracks knuckles*
It's not more than an hour of silent drifting before the front door of the house opens and then footsteps can be heard in the kitchen.]
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Shit —
[ He realizes he hadn't checked in with Takiishi at all, which is unlike him, regardless of the likelihood of Takiishi not answering. He's painfully aware that he's dressed like crap and can't change, because his clothes are all in their walk-in closed.
And Umemiya is in his fucking bed. ]
Shit.
[ Rare for him, his tone takes on an emotional edge, though he's still quiet.
It's not a matter of whether Takiishi will care or not. Endo cares. He cares so fucking much that he digs the heels of his hands into his eyes to attempt to think through some stupid plan before he takes any action at all. ]
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From what both of them can hear, though, Takiishi's come home in a mood that's not immediately explosive. Nothing's being thrown across the kitchen and living room; there's no yelling.]
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[ Endo begins in a whisper, a clear threat in his tone — one that he has never used with Umemiya before. But as soon as he says that first word, he cuts himself off, because nothing warrants any statement that would follow. Umemiya isn't doing anything at all. There's nothing to warn him off of.
And he has no plan. Sure, he could probably come up with something, but anything he thinks of would be insulting to Takiishi or offensive to Umemiya. And Endo doesn't want either of those things.
It's no big deal, on paper. Takiishi doesn't have expectations for Endo. He does like Umemiya, and that's a little fucked up on Endo's part, but that's not the part that's really messed up.
Endo had his own rules about this kind of thing. Respecting their space. Respecting Takiishi. Keeping people away, and always putting him first.
He made a stupid, selfish decision, all because he didn't want to be alone.
It's too late to take it back, so Endo opens the door and while he keeps his body language loose and easy enough, there's a subdued quality to it all the same. ]
Hey.
[ He says this to Takiishi. He hasn't given Umemiya instructions at all. In fact, he hasn't even looked at him. ]
You're home early.
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[So, like, he could change and go back out. Or he could lounge on the couch in the nice air conditioned house. Either way, he needs a moment. Ugh, hot.
Umemiya stays in the bedroom, pretending not to be listening to everything.]
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Want me to pick something else out for you?
[ Something lighter and more comfortable. Then Endo can change, too.
When he turns back around, he glances at the door. He'll tell Takiishi, but only after he finishes taking care of him as best he can, considering. ]
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[If Takiishi has even noticed a difference in what Endo is wearing, it doesn't show on his face as he goes to the fridge for a snack.]
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When he emerges, he sets the clothes on the counter for Takiishi to grab whenever he's ready. ]
Umemiya's here, by the way.
[ He says it casually, but he doesn't feel casual about it at all. ]
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[Takiishi isn't upset, he's just completely confused. The path that leads to Umemiya being here in their home isn't something he can perceive.]
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Endo doesn't think he has.
And that's perfectly fine — he doesn't need him to know — but it makes this situation more awkward.
It would be even harder to explain the cascading effect of Takiishi's decision to go out, but that's because it would lead to confessions that Endo doesn't foist upon him. So all he says is: ]
I invited him.
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[It doesn't make any sense. But it's a situation that's here now.]
Where is he?
[In the bedroom, Umemiya is listening and staying put, scared he's fucked things up for all of them, by accepting that invitation.]
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He doesn't say this, though it's not because he's trying to be difficult or keep secrets. It's just hard to face it himself sometimes, with how everything still tangles up within him. ]
In my bedroom.
[ He isn't embarrassed — just guilty, frustrated with himself, and apologetic. ]
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I'm going to go change.
[Maybe it'll make sense when he's not as hot.]
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That's a thought he immediately shoves down, because it's irrational. He doesn't want to make Takiishi angry or unhappy, no matter what, so it doesn't make sense that he'd want more from him.
He smiles for the first time since Takiishi's arrival. ]
Yeah, okay.
[ He wants Takiishi to be comfortable.
But as soon as Takiishi goes to do that, Endo returns to his bedroom, running a hand through his hair as he looks at Umemiya. ]
You should go.
[ This is all he says, immediately turning to go back to the kitchen to wait for Takiishi. It is not the way a submissive should be treating a Dominant. It's not the way someone should treat the person who just held him, making him feel secure and cared for in the ways he's wanted — but it feels like this is over.
He warned Umemiya. But Endo still feels like shit about it, just like he feels like shit for doing this in the first place. ]
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[To come between them. To be a point of tension. To surprise Takiishi. To make things so complicated.]
...I'm sorry.
[He stands, grabs his bag. Gives Endo a lingering look of uncertainty.]
Are you two going to be okay?
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There's an honest answer to Umemiya's question, which is that there is something that isn't turning out okay, but Endo is back to dismissiveness, a wall firmly back in place. ]
You heard him. It's no big deal.
[ At the least, Takiishi did not say anything to indicate that he cares either which way, aside from being surprised at the situation.
It is a big deal though — to Endo, if no one else. ]
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[He knows Endo well enough to almost feel the way his heart is squeezed in a situation like this. But he's moving for the door, knowing that lingering won't help anyone.]
I can text you later, or something.
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[ He says it without bothering to look at Umemiya again. He doesn't want to see anything in his face. He doesn't want sympathy, or care, or hurt, or any of that — not anymore. He just wants to go back to taking care of Takiishi, like this never happened. Like Umemiya never happened.
But that thought makes him clench his teeth as he stares at the refrigerator, a subtle tension tightening his shoulders. Because even now, in the thick of all of this, Endo is still Umemiya's.
But he's more Takiishi's. ]
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